Perspectives

Last night, as I lay awake (insomnia is great for introspective moments), this blog came to mind.  It was begun back in 2006, as our family made a faith journey, as well as a literal journey from one state to another.  I needed a sort of "incognito" space to express my thoughts and feelings as we moved from the denomination of our childhoods to a new place.  (As a wise friend put it, we were learning to stop putting God in our boxes.)  From time to time, I also shared some of the struggles of dealing with anxiety and panic attacks.

Then, as we settled into a new phase of life, the postings became a bit more of the practical, day-to-day-in-the-life-of-a-home-schooling-mom style.  It was an outlet for me.  I spent most of my hours being "mom" and "teacher".  Sometimes I just needed to be "Joni".

Along the way, I met several other bloggers.  I learned so much from their writing styles and techniques.  On a deeper level, though, I learned from their journeys.  They were experiencing trials and joys unique to their own paths.  Their openness and willingness to share their fears, doubts, joys, triumphs, and sorrows, and yet still clinging to God in the midst of it all, encouraged me to do the same.  (As a side note, I am now "friends" with most of these fine people on Facebook.  I've also had the privilege of meeting some of them face-to-face!)

Over the past several years, our lives have taken on a new perspective.  My husband began a discernment period that stretched over 4 1/2 years, and ended in great disappointment and hurt for our family.  (Every cloud does have a silver lining.  My husband has moved into a previously unexpected job position, for which we are truly grateful.)  However, those times of trial have changed all of us.

Both of our sons have grown into adulthood, which has brought about a whole new phase of worries, but also many times of joy!  We are incredibly proud of both of them.  It is especially interesting to watch the ways they grow in their faith.  Of course, they have their own sets of struggles, doubts, and learning curves.  But God is always faithful in the midst of it all.

This past year has been a particularly difficult time.  I shared some of the details in a post in August.  Each member of our family of four has had some tough experiences.  It's not as if we've expected God to allow us skip through fields of daisies and fill every day with hearts, rainbows, and unicorns.  I do hope that 2020 is a bit less "stretching", though.  😊

The one thing we have been walking through as a family is the loss of my dad.  Though we knew the time would come, experiencing it has been difficult.  If you've read my post about Dad, I hope you have even an inkling of what a special man he was to all of us.  Our grief is not without hope, as my dad was truly a friend of God.  But it is still hard, nonetheless.

And so, it is my 53rd birthday.  (I admitted my age!!!)  I have become a reflective person, though I feel I have always been one in at least some small sense.

Let's see where the next year takes me as a writer/blogger.